Email unlocks one free roast

Your landing page is probably losing you money.

Paste a URL. Scorch captures the page, scores it against a locked rubric, and returns savage-but-specific burns with expert fixes underneath.

SSRF-guarded public URL capturerubric@1.0.0 scoringPage roasts, never personal attacks

URL in, report out

Roast a launch page

0-100

score

Unlock free roast

Email sign-in unlocks one free roast.

01

Loading the page

02

Reading the hero

03

Checking the proof

04

Sharpening the scorecard

Guard the URL

We normalize the URL, block private networks, and re-check redirects before capture.

Score the page

Clarity, hero, CTA, proof, value, hierarchy, and friction roll into one honest score.

Write the roast

Three specific burns for shareability, then fixes a solo maker can ship today.

Post the card

Every permalink has an OG scorecard built for X, Slack, and Discord unfurls.

The funnel

Funny enough to share. Useful enough to fix the page.

Burns are the hook, but the product is the ranked fix list. Every result page pushes the maker toward a better launch, a paid credit pack when they need more passes, or an expert review when the page needs human judgment before traffic goes live.

ScorchCardexample.com

63

/ 100

Pretty page, pricey confusion

Your hero sounds expensive, but the visitor still has to guess what you actually sell.

Roast yours at scorch.levships.comby @levarakelyan